patience is a virtue, but impatience gets results

Day 21 and still homeless.

My patience is running out.

We found an apartment that we liked two weeks ago, and we only just found out today that there’s no possible way for us to have it. Apparently everyone in Germany has to have a work contract to show before anyone will rent them something. Of course, to have a work contract, I need a visa. To have a visa, I need an address. It’s all a vicious cycle. Carlos isn’t much better off either; our money is apparently no good here. In a city where about 16% of the population is immigrants, it’s hard to believe that everyone has gone the legal and responsible route in finding a home here. Where the heck are they getting their flats?

We’re not sure what to do now, but one thing that’s certain is that we can’t stay here in the hostel, leaking money like water and putting up with all kinds of inhospitable houseguests, from the guy who turns the light on at 5am to the rowdy Spanish partiers to the super snorer to the girl who eats her breakfast with her mouth open. There’s no rest and no future for us here.

Maybe we won’t even stay in Berlin. For all the amazing things we’ve heard, neither of us is overly impressed. It’s a city in constant change, in constant motion, always destroying and recreating itself. Like most other towns other people love, it’s only nice to stay for a few days. If you’re a punk, an artist, a hippie, or gay, you’d probably fit in right at home here. I am none of those things, and I still haven’t found my niche. I’m wondering if my niche isn’t somewhere else entirely.

The problem is, we chose Berlin for the economic factor. Sure, we could move to any other city, but it will probably cost us twice as much to live there. Without a definite job offer, I’m not sure we can risk it.

I feel like we are taking two steps back and none forward, but of course, none of this is really anything we could have planned. For all the research we did, for all the flats we looked at beforehand, for all the luck I had in finding a job before I even came, there are things nobody tells you until you’re here and shit outta luck. We are learning everything the hard way, and we’re running out of time.

And we wait.


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